Dating Apps: Yay or Nay?

When was the last time you tried something for the first time? This is what made me join a “dating” phone app for a bit of an experiment I suppose. Here are ten things I noticed.

1)   Grammar. There were many guys who need to learn grammar. “Hae bUtiful” I wouldn’t even bother replying. I’m sorry. Just no. Type how you talk in real life. Don’t announce it if you can’t pronounce it.

2)  Pick up lines.  My favourite had to be “I think I just got lost in your eyes, can you help me find a way out?” Unless you are Ryan Gosling then no.

3)  Rating. Wow. I felt so sad sitting there rating people I didn’t even know. It was creepy seeing who had rated my photos. Especially because a lot of them looked four times my age.

4)  Photos. Seeing as you can’t see this person in real life you turn into a shallow human being whether you like it or not. Ignoring people you don’t like the look of (some looked really dodgy ok) and rejecting their request to meet/talk. It was so amusing to get guys say one word to me, hi, then ask to see my private photos (that were about as dodgy as a G rated film and were simply a few photos from Facebook) all the requests to see them was getting annoying and made it obvious the guy was either a lovely curious guy with no bad intentions or thought I had some explicit photos lurking behind the locked button. Sorry to disappoint.

Be careful and never fall for the guy claiming to be Enrique Iglesias. Big giveaway if a guy uses celebrity photos.

5)  Egos. Perhaps guys posing with their shirts off/holding them up with their hand and a “seductive face” whilst posing in the mirror are just proud to flaunt their body? Moving on.

6) First impressions. I must say first impressions on this thing are tricky. What are you meant to say to a random human you have never met in your life? “Hey how are you?” I’ve said that line far too much. I could have put on a different personality as such for each guy that messaged me to see what their reaction would be like. Oh the laughs I would have had.

7)  Getting physical physical. Touche to the guy that was completely honest and said on his profile “I’m a nice guy. But I’m not here to talk about nice things with nice people. I’m here for discrete casual sex.”  Sounds like something out of fifty shades of grey so yeah I deleted the app after that.

8)  Local area. If people want to meet someone more local then use a more local app, mine showed guys from all over the country. Tinder. It locates people closest to you. Like a creepy navigator pirates would have found it handy back in the day to find enemies I’m sure. Argh matey!

9) About me profile. So many people had no info, booring. That is just asking to get judged by your photos on your profile, like some guys hugging their cars. Erm. Add a quirky quote or something funny. Ladies love humour. I wrote on mine “How to please me: Make me laugh. Make me food.” Perfect.

10)  Matches. If you liked someone you could either reject or accept to talk to them. The sign of a beautiful relationship or friendship blossoming. “I got a few matches but it don’t mean jack sh*t.” Says my friend of these dating apps. Beautifully said, and so true.

Overall I think this app reflects real life without the drama. Because girls and guys check each other out regularly, but they don’t say anything. Dating apps are a way of choosing who you want to talk to without the fear of rejection. I suppose I just felt rather awkward,and violated due to guys viewing my profile that were the same age as Dumbledore. This app would be good for those who are over stumbling around drunk in town exchanging numbers with the cute person in the corner. Then never speaking to them again. They say that relationships last ten times longer if you meet someone on a dating app. Compared to those that bump into each other in town drunk one night.

Some guys actually held a really good conversation with me which is a challenge because I change the topic, and relate most things to song. Life is a musical after all am I right? I am right. Or to the left to the left. See? Anyway. Touche to them. Maybe I will keep in touch with them maybe not. No matter what happens anyone that comes into your life makes a difference. Positive or negative. These apps are kind of good and bad. Good because you’re out of your comfort zone, talking to people confidentially behind a screen. Bad perhaps because it takes away the excitement of going up to someone you’ve wanted to always talk to. In person. Like the handsome man/pretty girl that works around the corner but you’re to afraid to go up to them in case you pronounce the word Cappuccino wrong? Yeah.

Maybe it does workout for some people. Would I go on a dating app again? It’s not for me. I think I’ll stick to the best one which is real life interactions.

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